Before you think I'm being swallowed into a hopeless hole of gloom with no aspiration to personal growth, I will say that rather than a goal I have an aspiration of what I want for this year. It can be summed up in one word: More. I want more creativity in my life. I want a more orderly, and organized home. I want to spend more time with my daughter, and be focused on her and not on my "Que haceres." I want more out of life and I want to enjoy it more.
This is my first year as a stay at home mom. It's my first year as a mom at all. I am learning to juggle my sweet Sirenita, who is almost four months old now, find my identity outside of being a "top performer" at work, and figure out how not to let my house go to poop. That last one is the hardest for me, I confess that I am somewhat OCD. Somewhat, by the grace of God, because I know I could be extremely OCD if it weren't for him.
That being said, I like a spotless house. It's already impossible. Just when I get the whole house cleaned, the bedding washed, and the baby dressed super cute, curdled milk gushes forth from the depths of my child like some kind of hidden spring, bubbling all over my bedding, my child, and cascading onto the carpet only to hide while I desperately search for it with carpet cleaner in hand and be found later by my foot. *deep breath after all that* I am coming to terms with the impossibility of a spotless house. There are things that are out of my control. While spotless is impossible, clean and neatly organized is not.
Usually in January, I go on a mad de-cluttering rampage. I take out bags of garbage and give away bags of bizarre trinkets that have built up throughout the year who knows how. I don't even know where this stuff comes from. Most of it hides so well no one but me would ever know it's there. I always feel better once it's gone. I admit I despaired of ever having a junk free home again when I began to think about trying to rampage de-clutter my home while caring for my child. Then the revelation came; Just do what you can do.
When Sirenita was born I would stress about getting the regular cleaning done. The first Monday I was home alone I tried to clean the entire house between feedings and ended up showering at 3 PM, eating lunch at 4 PM. Thankfully, I had lots of food in the fridge and didn't have to cook dinner. It was obvious to me that cleaning like this wasn't going to work. I couldn't clean the house first, then take care of my own needs. I couldn't get the entire house spotless in between feedings and naps. One day, as I was fretting over it, I had this revelation. Just do what you can. I know it sounds obvious, but it was freeing to realize that if I couldn't dust the whole house or clean the shower twice a week the world wouldn't end. Eventually I'd catch back up to the next time it was "supposed to be done," and it would get taken care of.
Maybe it seems stupid to some, but it made such a difference to me. I started to relax, and enjoy my daughter more. The more I relaxed and spent time with her instead of time trying to get her to sleep so I could be away from her, the happier we both were. I've learned to do my cleaning around my little Sirenita now. We have a pretty good routine going, and if something doesn't get done, it's turn will come around again. I've learned to break up my housework into little manageable bites.
This year, instead of binge de-cluttering, I am taking it in bites. I've broken my house up into 6 segments. Last week I actually de-cluttered our entire Study. Our study is infested with Junk Gnomes. Junk Gnomes are a relative to the packrat. They bring in shiny things, "useful" things, cute and fun toys, junk mail, etc. and jam it all into the closet, the bookshelf, and the desk. It usually takes me about four hours to de-clutter the entire study. This year I did it over three days. Each day I focused on a segment of the Study. It took a good deal less time since there was less to deal with at a time. I probably spent no more than an hour and a half over three days on it, instead of my typical four hours.
Turns out a clutter free home is not impossible with a small child. It just has to be taken from a different perspective. To help me stay on track, I've created a weekly cleaning plan, and a 6 week rotating cleaning plan to help conquer the Junk Gnomes. I've even scheduled dog grooming in my plan. We've had this miniature sheep wandering the house for months and when I got out the sheep sheers I found it is actually our toy poodle. Oops.
I believe people have a natural tendency to feel plans are binding. The reality is that a good plan can be freeing. What goes around comes around. Just do what you can" - meaning if something on the to-do list doesn't get done, oh well. It's turn will come around again, but this day with the family will never come back.
Weekly plan:
Monday - Kitchen, Bathroom, and mop floor
Tuesday - Vacuum and Dust (pick up bedrooms and study while dusting) , Give the dog a bath
Wednesday - Conquer a Junk Gnome task
Thursday - Laundry
Friday - Kitchen, Bathroom, mop floor
Junk Gnome Battle Plan:
Week 1 - Study
Week 2 - Hall closet and Laundry room
Week 3 - Master bedroom
Week 4 - Kitchen
Week 5 - Nursery and guest bathroom
Week 6 - Garage (and dog grooming)
I plan on keeping up with this rotation through the year. The only (or at least best) way to eat an Elephant is bite by bite. The only way to keep things going with a little one is chipping at it little by little. Don't stress about it. If you miss something one week, you can get it next rotation. Having a schedule helps! There's a time for everything. Keep it in it's place, and don't let it take your family's place. Enjoy the freedom of maintaining a plan and not feeling you have to do it all at once. If it doesn't get done, it's ok. Just do what you can do.
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